We’ve all had people in our church or Christian community who aren’t our favorite. Maybe they hurt us in the past, or perhaps it’s simply a clash of personalities. As believers, it’s almost inevitable—we’ll encounter this in our small groups, serve teams, or church committees. Maybe with one person, maybe with several. So, how do we respond to brothers and sisters in Christ whom we love in faith, but struggle to like in practice?

Paul offers guidance in Romans:

“Let love be genuine. Abhor what is evil; hold fast to what is good. Love one another with brotherly affection. Outdo one another in showing honor. Do not be slothful in zeal, be fervent in spirit, serve the Lord. Rejoice in hope, be patient in tribulation, be constant in prayer. Contribute to the needs of the saints and seek to show hospitality.”
Romans 12:9–13

This passage challenges us to love one another sincerely, with brotherly affection. That’s more than polite tolerance—it’s a call to treat fellow believers as true family, because in Christ, they are.

Paul goes even further: Outdo one another in showing honor. That’s a radical idea. You might say, “But they hurt me,” or “We just don’t get along.” Scripture doesn’t tell us to honor only those who deserve it—it tells us to honor everyone (1 Peter 2:17), regardless of how we feel or what’s happened in the past. 

This can feel impossible. How do we love and honor someone who hasn’t done the same for us? In our strength, we can’t. But God never calls us to do this alone. He empowers us to live in ways that reflect His grace, even when it’s hard.

When you’re weary of showing love to someone who doesn’t seem worthy of it, remember this: Christ honored the most dishonorable—us—by going to the cross. When you reflect on the mercy you’ve received, you’ll find it easier to extend that mercy to others.

Reflect today on the person (or people) in your life who you’re struggling to love well. Pray that God help you to honor them well. Thank God for the mercy and love He shows you daily.